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Kids Corner Jokes of the Day
- What do you call a flying skunk?
A smellacopter!
- submitted by John in Newark - Who did the prune take to the dance?
A date!
- submitted by Julia in Bryn Mawr - What goes "ha-ha-ha-clunk"?
People laughing their heads off!
- submitted by Janice in Phoenixville - What do bananas do in the gym?
They do banana splits!
- submitted by Hannah in Wynnwood - Where does the baseball player keep his lemonade?
In the Pitcher!
- submitted by Sean in Glenside - What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite!
- submitted by Ian in Talleyville - What color is a burp?
Burple, of course!
- submitted by Andrew in Doylestown - Why do mother dalmations always find their pups?
Because they're already spotted!
- submitted by Julianna in Langhorne - What do you get when you cross a pirate with an ice cube?
A Shiver-Me-Timbers!
- submitted by Maura in Lawrence - Why was the computer mouse in trouble?
Because its a cursor!
- submitted by CJ in Lansdowne - Why did the gym get hot once the game ended?
Because all the fans left!
- submitted by Bri in Haddonfield - What do you get when you cross an elephant with Darth Vader?
An Elevader!
- submitted by Sage in Pennsauken - What type of dog can answer the phone for you?
A Golden Receiver!
- submitted by Rachel in Garnet Valley - What would happen if a piano fell on you?
You would be flat!
- submitted by Mylea in York - Why can't a human nose be twelve inches long?
Because then it would be a foot!
- submitted by Billy in Wilmington - What kind of bugs do secret agents like?
Spy-ders!
- submitted by Josh in Yardley - What word is always spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly!
- submitted by Robin in Havertown - What do grapes do when you give them a squeeze?
They give a little whine!
- submitted by Julia in Eagleville - Why should you put band-aids in the fridge?
For cold cuts!
- submitted by Jamie in Mt. Airy - What happened to the plant in math class?
It grew square roots!
- submitted by Alan in Gibbsboro - What did the big flower say to the little flower?
Hey Bud! How ya doin'?
- submitted by Kimberly in Narberth - Why is Alabama the smartest state in the United States?
Because it has four As and one B!
- submitted by Rachel in Conshohoken - What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderwear!
- submitted by Hannah Mae in Coatesville - How do you know when a clock gets hungry?
It goes back four seconds!
- submitted by Franklin in Philadelphia - Which food is essential to good music?
The beet!
- submitted by Travis in Wilmington - What did one wall say to the other wall?
Meet you at the corner!
- submitted by Elizabeth in Royersford - Why did the germ cross the microscope?
To get to the other slide!
- submitted by Timmy in Elkins Park - What time is it when an elephant sits on your chair?
Time to get a new chair!
- submitted by Annika in Wyndmoor - What goes "Ha, Ha, Ha... clunk"
People laughing their heads off!
- submitted by Isaae in Philadelphia - What songs do planets sing?
Neptunes!
- submitted by Jamie in Elkins Park - What type of music do balloons hate?
POP Music!
- submitted by Michaela in Newtown Square - What has three feet but can't walk?
A Yardstick!
- submitted by Leslie in Baltimore - How do scientists freshen their breath?
With experi-mints!
- submitted by John in Lancaster - What's a pirate's favorite restaurant?
Arrrr-by's!
- submitted by Hanna in Collingswood - What did one pencil say to the other pencil?
My, you're looking sharp!
- submitted by Trevor in Glenside - Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide!!
- submitted by Louise in Wayne - How can you tell if a tree is a Dogwood Tree?
By its bark!
- submitted by Joel in Philadelphia - When is the Moon its heaviest?
When it's full!
- submitted by Brittney in Holland - What do you call an underwater spy?
Pond. James Pond.
- submitted by Karen in Lancaster - What kind of star is dangerous?
A shooting star!
- submitted by Britney in Haverford - Why was the cookie crying?
Because its mother had been a wafer so long!
- submitted by Daniel in Merion - What did the limestone say to the geologist?
Don't take me for granite!
- submitted by Yoni in Pennsauken - Why couldn't the pirates play cards?
Because the Captain was on the deck!
- submitted by Ben in New Hope - What is the name of the fairy that never washes?
Stinkerbell!
- submitted by Hanna in Pottstown - Why was the Queen's throne all wet?
Because she's reigned for many years!
- submitted by Patrick in Elkins Park - How can you tell if a tree is a Dogwood Tree?
By its bark!
- submitted by Jesse in York - What time is it when seven hungry lions are chasing after you?
It's seven after one!
- submitted by Irene in New Hope - What is a penguin's favourite aunt?
Ant-Arctica!
- submitted by Phoebe in Cheltenham - How much did the pirate pay for his hoop earrings?
A buccaneer!
- submitted by Sydney in Elkins Park - What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No Idea (no eye deer)!
- submitted by Trevor in Quakertown - Why was the nose sad?
Because it didn't get picked!
- submitted by Jennifer in Wilmington - What does a cat say when things go well?
PURRRR-fect!
- submitted by Mali in Westmont - Why don't anteaters get sick?
Because they're full of antibodies!
- submitted by Dave in Philadelphia - Where do generals keep their armies?
In their sleevies!
- submitted by Debby in Philadelphia - Where do horses live?
In Neigh-borhoods!
- submitted by Scott in Philadelphia - What do you call someone else's cheese?
Nacho Cheese!
- submitted by Joseph in Philadelphia - What state has four eyes?
Mississippi!
- submitted by Alayna in Glenside - How do Santa's helpers learn to read?
First they learn the "Elf-A-Bet"!
- submitted by Ian in North East, MD - What runs but never walks?
Water!
- submitted by Kristina in Jersey City - Why was the mushroom always invited to parties?
Because he was a FUNGI -- a fun guy!
- submitted by John in Telford - Why was the Math Book unhappy?
Because it had too many problems!
- submitted by Owen in Philadelphia - Why did the girl put sugar on her pillow before bed?
Because she wanted to have Sweet Dreams!
- submitted by Colleen in Woodbury - How do you fix a chimpanzee?
You use a monkeywrench!
- submitted by Cormac in Titusville - What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
- submitted by Bobby in Gibbsboro - Why don't skeletons fight?
Because they don't got the guts!
- submitted by Maggie from Jersey City - What is a lion's favorite car?
A fer-roar-i!
- submitted by Beatrice from Kennett Square - What do you do if there's a fly in the room?
Call the SWAT team!
- submitted by Danny from Willow Grove - How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz!
- submitted by Maddy from North Wilmington - Where do french fries come from?
Greece! (grease)
- submitted by Sarah from Aurora, CO - Did you hear the joke about the mosquito?
Nevermind, it will just annoy you.
- submitted by Ed from Yardley - What kind of bee is born in the month of May?
A Maybe!
- submitted by Olivia from Douglassville - Why do cows wear bells around their neck?
Because their horns don't work!
- submitted by Lenny from Philadelphia - Why did the raisin go out with the prune?
Because it couldn't find a "date" !
- submitted by Owen from Philadelphia - Why did the cookie go to the doctor
Because he felt crummy!
- submitted by Joey from Ridley Park - What cat can't you trust?
A Cheetah!
- submitted by Damaris from West Chester - What do you get when you cross Batman with a steamroller?
Flatman!
- submitted by Rebecca from Bethlehem - What weighs 500 pounds and wears glass slippers?
CinderElephant!
- submitted by Christina from Audubon - Why couldn't the 10 year old go to the pirate movie?
Because it was rated RRRRR!
- submitted by Kaitlin from Coatesville - What is a fish's favorite place to visit?
Finland!(FIN-land)
- submitted by M.T. from Westmont - What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anyone can roast beef but no one can pee soup!
- submitted by Elizabeth from Havertown - Why did Mickey Mouse go to space?
To see his friend Pluto!
- submitted by Nina from Belle Mead - Where do dead letters go?
To the ghost office!
- submitted by Madalyn from Chalfont - Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
He wanted to win the No Bell prize.
- submitted by Kianna from Green Bay, WI - Which side of a dog has the most hair?
The Outside!
- submitted by Dale from Lebanon - What is a teacher's favorite type of music?
CLASSical music!
- submitted by Evan from Lumberton - Why should you never say something bad about corn in a cornfield?
Because the corn have ears!
- submitted by Johnny from Lancaster - What did the mama ghost say to the baby ghost before heading out?
Buckle your sheet belt!
- submitted by Julia from Mullica Hill - What is Bigfoot's favorite vegetable?
Sasquash!
- submitted by Paul from Honey Brook - What kind of cereal do cats like?
Mice Krispies!
- submitted by Katie from Hilltop - Why doesn't a pine tree knit very well?
Because they're always dropping their needles!
- submitted by Danny from Willow Grove - Why is Cinderella such a good outfielder?
Because she always gets to the ball.
- submitted by Ed from Yardley